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Lessons From Outlaw #1 - Don't give up! Don't live to regret opportunities you missed

In the first episode of the pod, Dermot Gallagher inspired me by talking about his life, the opportunities he missed in his childhood and his opinion on what he thinks it takes to achieve your dreams.


The conversation flowed between the present time as a father and his childhood and we discussed how the lessons he’s learnt have dictated the way he wants to raise his kids.


Retrospective conversations like this are always dangerous as you can't change anything in the past, but Dermot’s realisations really inspired me to look at everything I do as an opportunity to take and he made me really assess moments where I could have applied myself more.


Perspective:



Sometimes it's hard to have the right perspective to understand the progress we are making in the present moment. When we are young it is very easy to give up on something and move on because we don't recognise the process of growth.


How many of you gave up learning a musical instrument or stopped playing a sport because we weren't as good as others or as good as we thought we should be? We look at our current ability and never really think about the longer term and how we could improve in time.


When things aren't going well it is really hard to see a positive outcome too. This is the point where digging in matters. You are only one big decision away from changing your fortunes, so you need to keep fighting to be in the positions where these opportunities keep coming.


It is too easy to give up at the first hurdles. We need to see hurdles as growth opportunities and learning curves and the way we react dictates the outcome.


Failure has somehow developed as an embarrassing and negative outcome to trying something hard. Without those willing to risk it all humanity’s evolution would not be as it is now. We need risk-takers, we need people to be brave for our society to grow.


Presence and Humility:



I love this short because it shows two of Dermot's biggest strengths. His presence and humility when observing himself. He has this realisation that his children need to recognise that failure is ok, that life isn't easy and that our strength comes from our failures and ability to be vulnerable.


By showing them where he failed, and talking to them about his regrets he is giving them every opportunity to see the bigger spectrum of life.


The power of presence is unbeatable and something I've worked on trying to improve over the last year.


It is effortless for our minds to wonder and switch between the past, future and present. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learnt is that nothing gets done in the past or future only in the current moment, so dwelling or dreaming about a life you could have had is just a waste of time.


I like to dedicate time to reflection, and I choose the word reflect for a reason, because reflections are controlled thoughts and not free thoughts. By setting aside time in the day for my mind to wonder I am creating space to filter out any thoughts that might distract me. Therefore, creating more presence in the rest of my day.


By creating this space I also gain insight into where my deeper thoughts are going and I can respond to who I am and want to be.


Show up:



‘You can't be a hero every session’!


I love this because it highlights a problem we have with personal development. For some reason, we judge our progress over shorter periods than long . We think we need to see progress immediately to be making progress but it just isn't true.


Consistency is the most important thing to develop and consistency is a measure over a longer period. But consistency comes from us not judging ourselves every day and just turning up, hitting the reps, practising and gradually improving.


Showing up is the only part that matters. Being in the space to grow, knocking at the door and figuring out how to improve just 1% is essential. It doesn't matter if you do a bad workout. A bad workout is better than no workout.


It is about developing a mindset that doesn't judge or give in. When you need to work, you work. Living a life of success is just learning how to grind and produce some sort of result and over time those results multiply.


Despite being the first episode of the podcast, this is still one of my favourites because of Dermot's pure honesty and vulnerability.


Too often we speak negatively of ourselves and willow in pity. Dermot learns from his mistakes, without letting them drag him down and he uses them to learn and educate himself and his children.


For the full episode click the link to Spotify or YouTube below.



Youtube:




I am Will Flindall, host of the Valley of Outlaws Podcast where I speak to those who have decided to take control of their life and follow a passion or instinct.


If you feel like you could be getting more from your life, then maybe one of the conversations I’ve had with the Outlaws might help you kickstart a change.


Peace x

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